I need everything to stay open and never shut down....simple ? NOT!!!

The second of those settings, if enabled, will force all the windows to close when the Mac restarts. Since you’re getting an orderly shut down, you have something set to shut down your Mac every night. It doesn’t sound like you’re getting a kernel panic that is causing it to restart, but that’s also possible.

Short of you having a schedule set to restart it every night I don’t know what would cause it to do that. This article shows how to check that, but it doesn’t get set magically.

Schedule your Mac to turn on or off in Terminal - Apple Support

Two suggestions.

This sounds like you have logout after idle enabled. Go to System Settings > Privacy & Security and scroll all the way to the bottom. Click on the Advanced... button. Is "Log out automatically after inactivity" enabled?

If so, turn it off.

Second suggestion, try running caffeinate in a Terminal window. This is likely an excessive case. Based on your description, it sounds like suggestion one is the culprit. Especially since you described that apps with open documents are halting the logout process.

Hope this helps

Here is another thing to check. A few operating systems ago (like maybe 10.12 or 10.13), there was a bug where a managed device would enforce a logout timer and then when removed, the logout timer would remain. I am wondering if despite the UI showing the setting is off, that the preference is still set.

Run this command from Terminal:

defaults read /Library/Preferences/.GlobalPreferences.plist

This will read the contents of the .GlobalPreferences.plist file and display them in the Terminal. No changes will be made to anything.

If you have the feature enabled, and the default value is 60 minutes, you will see a key/value pair like this:

    "com.apple.autologout.AutoLogOutDelay" = 3600;

The value of 3600 is 60 seconds * 60 minutes, thus 3600 seconds. With the feature disabled, this key/value pair should not be present in the preference file.

For quite a long time now, the default behavior of macOS is to never restart never shut down and restore all apps to what state they were in if you did shut down. If you have enabled, ask to close windows before shutting down, that defeats the whole Resume process.

if it does not then there is this third party app which sole purpose is just that

Caffeine - Keeps your Mac awake. (caffeine-app.net)