Folder went missing after sharing folder with my wife

I decided to take all of our important files and put them into a “important family files” folder and add my wife to the drive as a user. It seemed to be working fine. I see the folder on my my MacBook, my iPhone, and my wife’s iPhone. Then all of a sudden it disappeared. I checked recently deleted both job the app and under settings to recover and nothing. I had all my very important files in there and now they are gone. It was a big folder too... and no trace of it at all now. Does anyone have any idea how to get it back or where it went???? Thanks