Why does apple want me to go to the bank to activate my debit card on apple pay

A Debit or Credit card may be required. Any purchases will first come from your Apple Account and your card will not be charged unless the funds run out in your Apple Account. The requirement for needing a card is not specifically stated by Apple, although if you make a purchase and receive a message to update your account or verification is required, then you will need one. This is noted in step 2 of the support article if you cannot download apps.

If you can’t download or update apps on your iPhone or iPad - Apple Support

I have not heard of that before. Not sure why the bank would say that Apple wants you to go to them. It is the bank that approves or denies the card when adding to the Wallet app, Apple does not do that. Some banks don't even have a local branch where a user could go. Sounds like the bank wants to physically check your identification before making that authorization and putting the blame on Apple so you are not mad at them.

I have seen cases where the user needed to call the bank and the bank was able to activate the card for Apple Pay use on their account and then they were able to successfully add it. I have also seen cases where the account information for the card did not match the Apple ID information that Apple provides your bank to be able to make that confirm/deny decision.

countrylizzard wrote:

Its weird because these apps are FREE. SO they shouldnt need my account info or debit card if the app is FREE

Being free just means that you won't be charged to download the apps. Most of those free apps you download also contain subscriptions and in-app purchases where that payment method may be needed. Developers do not pay yearly fees and their time and money to create and continue to update apps just because they are generous people. They add those optional methods in hopes you will find their work valuable enough to continue and support their efforts.

As stated already if you have an Apple Account balance, any charges will only come from there. There is no identity verification when creating an Apple Account and entering into a contractual obligation using one of these optional payment methods verifies your identity by using the card you add to your account. The Apple ID information must match the information on the account holder of the card added, otherwise the bank will not approve the card when you attempt to add it.